Struggling with Jennifer Knapp
- 05.11.10
- Culture, Music, Jennifer Knapp
- 13 Comments
Jennifer Knapp is a songwriter and Christian musician whose lyrics have always been honest and at times profound. Her music is good; a folk/rock mix with a sometimes gritty and raw edge. Two of her three albums were Grammy nominated, and in total, the three albums have sold nearly one million copies. She put out these albums between 1998 and 2001…and then she fell off the face of the earth – almost literally. For the last seven years, she has been roaming around Australia with only her acoustic guitar. She sold everything else and walked away from it all.
And then last September, she came out of hiding, moved back to the U.S., and decided it was time to record a new album (which is being released today). Not only did she come out of hiding; she also came out of the closet, confirming what some had suspected to be true for years that she was – in fact – gay. In a recent Christianity Today interview, Jennifer said, “I’m certainly in a same-sex relationship now, but when I suspended my work, that wasn’t even really a factor. I had some difficult decisions to make and what that meant for my life and deciding to invest in a same-sex relationship, but it would be completely unfair to say that’s why I left music.”
In one of her recent blog posts, she writes, “I share my life with a woman. I have approached this relationship with gratitude, joy and humility. I am honored to have the support of my loving family, a caring partner, friends and people of faith who have accepted me as I come, while encouraging me to become who I am meant to be.”
As would be expected, Jennifer’s “coming out” has been met with many questions about how she justifies her faith with her sexuality. In a recent interview with Relevant Magazine, she said that the concept of homosexuality has “always sat a little bit uneasy with me, for one reason or another.” She goes on to say, “I’ve experienced a fair cross section of people in my life that has made me less concerned with what particular point I might label or call a sin.”
“As a Christian,” she continues, “I’m doing that as best as I can. The heartbreaking thing to me is that we’re all hopelessly deceived if we don’t think that there are people within our churches, within our communities, who want to hold on to the person they love, whatever sex that may be, and hold on to their faith.
In an interview with The Advocate, which is a gay and lesbian news magazine, Jennifer says that she no longer feels like being gay and being Christian are in opposition, even if others do. “I’m quite comfortable to live with parts of myself that don’t make sense to you,” she says.
And I guess this is where I struggle. I do hurt for her and for others who confess Christ while also struggling with their sexuality. I can’t imagine the pain, frustration, and confusion they must suffer. However, it seems from Jennifer’s words that she is no longer struggling. It seems that she has found a place where living as a Christ-follower and as a lesbian can comfortably co-exist. She no longer seems to be interested in engaging in the tension, and while I understand her desire to land somewhere outside the tension, I also feel sad for her.
My sin is just as bad as hers. I struggle with horrible things like anger, lust, spiritual apathy, and pride – just to name a few. And as much as I wish that I could be “comfortable” living with these things as a Christian, I can’t. I can not allow myself to get to the point where I let these things comfortably exist in my life. I must continue to live in the tension, and continue to fight daily to put off the sin which so easily entangles me.
Funny how Jennifer’s lyrics from a song on her first album come to mind: “Time to get down on my knees and pray, ‘Lord, undo me!’ Put away my flesh and bone ’til You own this spirit through me.” It seems as though she’s given up doing this, and for that, I am sad. I also see this as a clear warning for me in my struggle with sin. If I stop praying that the Lord would empower me daily to put away my flesh and allow His Spirit to fill me, there – but for the grace of God – would I go too.
Hey, Mike! Thanks for the excellent thoughts and perspective on Knapp…appreciate it! I enjoy your blog
Well put, Mike!!! I saw an interview with her on Larry King Live and there was also a pastor in the interview who seemed to slightly fail at representing the Truth as you just did in your article… a slice of humility with the reality of Truth…loved it! Press on, brother.
Wow…I had no idea she played for the other team. I met her once at an event I hosted at Borders when I worked for the music dept. She was really nice and signed for hours for people.
Thank you, Mike. Well said.
Very well said. Sin is a hard struggle regardless of what it is. Your tone and compassion is appreciated.
Mike I agree with your thoughts but please allow me to add to them. The fact that bothers me most in this story is not her sin, not her apparent acceptance of it but the fact that she doesn’t feel disqualified from being a christian music role model. Everyone struggles with sin. However, I believe certain areas of leadership are held to a higher standard. Whether she likes it or not the fact remains she is, on some level, a leader.
Doesn’t the Word talk about a time when the spirit of delusion would be so strong that people would choose to believe a lie? We’re definitely living in a time when good is called evil and evil good. We need to pray for her, and you’re article is well-stated! Reminds me of the saying,’Lord, help me to forgive those who sin differently than I do…’
my heart is broken for her because, like so many others of the faith, it would appear that she has simply given up in the struggle to become more and settled for being what she is, unfinished and undone. To press forward is a constant war in the flesh. To stop where we are is surrender to ourselves and our desires. Prayers and thoughts go out to her and her partner. God bless them both.
I read an article about this a couple weeks ago and the authors view was that maybe christians struggling with homosexuality have an easier time “coming out” and accepting the sin because the church doesn’t do anything to help them defeat the sin without judging them. The author used Ray Boltz (another christian music artist who came out as gay) as another example. He tried to seek help from the church for years. Maybe it’s because it’s such a taboo to address and talk about sexual sins in the church in general that it’s difficult to really take a stance and confront the issue head-on to help people. I do feel bad because I know with my own sin how hard it is to know the truth but go the “easier” route and sin anyway.
Thank you, Mike. I know that the evangelical church in general is not a safe place for people struggling with certain sins in particular. That also makes me feel very sad. Thank you for your godly, gentle words. The church has been abusive and inhospitable. We have reacted to the activists with such hostility that those who are struggling have found no place with us, and so they are loved and accepted by those who would strengthen their sin. We forget that homosexuality is included in a list of sins in I Corinthians 6:9-10 and then in verse 11, “and such WERE some of you”. May we be a people who are loving and hospitable as we struggle with those who struggle. May the lost find our churches to be safe places to enter without fear of rejection. May we see that gay people are people who have gifts, talents, and sins in addition to homosexuality, just as straight people have, and that all the flesh must be addressed. May we trust the Holy Spirit more and stop trying to usurp Him or outrun Him as He convicts people of sin. May we speak the truth in LOVE and understand that Love implies a relationship not just hateful words spoken in a soft and condescending voice.
I recommend http://www.christopheryuan.com/ as a site regarding this discussion. Prof. Yuan (Moody Bible Institute professor) mightly transformed by God, makes the inciteful statement “The opposite of homosexuality is not heterosexual; it is holiness.”
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Pastor Mike is making this same point.
That is one of the best commentaries I’ve heard on this topic. Thank you, Mike!
Check out the documentary “Frisbee: The Life and Death of a Preacher” for an interesting look at how the church has dealt with this issue in the past. Thought provoking.